Yummy Recipes

How to Fuck Up Dinner: Ground Turkey and Sweet Potato Noodles

I feel when people write about recipes, it’s primarily because they want you to try the recipe. Unfortunately, that is not the case with this recipe that I’m about to share with you all the details about.

Please heed the warning: do not make this recipe at home!

I was inspired to make ground turkey because one of my friends prefers it to cooking chicken. In fact, she has never made chicken because she’s afraid to handle the raw meat. I felt similarly until my mom taught me before I moved into my apartment, but anyway…

I was sick of eating chicken all the time so I thought that I should try out ground turkey. My mom isn’t a fan of ground turkey so I’ve never really had it before, and I now understand why.

I improvised based off of a recipe I found on my favorite Food Network app, In the Kitchen. It’s called “Corn Tortilla Tacos with Ground Turkey” by Darrell “DAS” Smith. I mostly used this recipe to get an understanding of how ground turkey should be cooked such as, for how long and with which spices you use. I didn’t make tacos with the turkey, but maybe I should’ve. I don’t know. I still think I would feel the same way: I don’t want to cook ground turkey again.

It is stinky. Perhaps it’s the brand I bought (it was very cheap turkey if that has anything to do with it), but I’m skeptical that that’s why. It was just so…game-y smelling. The way I feel about ground turkey is similar to how I feel about meats I don’t usually eat such as veal, lamb, duck…I’m just not used to them so when I’m cooking them, the smell is unpleasant to me.

The actual turkey tasted delicious, but every time I heated it up…the smell made me want to vomit so, no thank you.

How I cooked the turkey:

  1. I sauteed garlic in a pan of hot oil. That had a nice aroma.
  2. Then I added chopped tomato and red pepper and cooked that for a while.
  3. Once the garlic was golden and the veggies were soft, I added the turkey, along with the full cumin seeds, salt, and pepper.
  4. may have added a little cayenne, I’m not really sure though. Either way, the turkey tasted great on its own, although it would be great to use as taco meat too.

I know I spent all this time delving into the turkey, which was bad to me solely because of the smell; however, the real tragedy of this dinner was the sweet potato noodles.

I didn’t follow a recipe for this one because I make sweet potatoes somewhat frequently, so I felt confident in my ability to make them in noodle form. I was wrong. The noodles smelled and tasted so bad that they were inedible so I threw them all away. They were expensive too! I am not making that mistake again, I will just buy the actual sweet potato because I love them in actual potato-form anyway.

My mom has made me veggie noodles before like squash and zucchini, and I begged her to get the sweet potato ones for me because I love sweet potatoes. She didn’t appease me though and I forgot about the noodles and bought myself the regular potatoes, until a couple of weeks ago when I saw them in noodle form at ShopRite!

I was so excited to bring them home to cook them but what happened was that for some reason…I just blanked on how to season them. I was so focused on the turkey that I used similar seasonings and it was a noxious-smelling disaster.

How I cooked the sweet potato noodles:

  1. I cooked fresh garlic in a pan of hot oil until it was golden.
  2. I added the sweet potato noodles and came across what looked like a long, skinny carrot at the bottom. It smelled unpleasant and was hard as a rock. I assumed it was a factory-error such as…the machine that makes sweet potatoes into noodles fucked up and I got the remainder of the sweet potato, which at that point looked like a long, skinny carrot.
  3. I added dried basil to the pan as well as Italian seasoning, ground pepper, and turmeric. Why I didn’t only add cinnamon and nutmeg is still a disappointing mystery to me.

So what happened was, the sweet potatoes were burning and they stank because I seasoned them improperly. Plus, they had a weird texture. I don’t know what I was expecting (a regular sweet potato maybe??) but it was…hard. Even when they were wiggly like how noodles are, they didn’t have a potato texture I was expecting.

At this point, my girlfriend had arrived at my apartment and was displeased by all of the nasty smells in the kitchen. She made me throw out the sweet potatoes because she thought they were sketchy between the long, skinny carrot thing (at one point I thought I had bought carrot noodles by mistake. Not sure if they even make those lol) and because the noodles had a weird texture. She doubted that they were organic and she suspected they had been treated to retain a noodle consistency instead of becoming potato-y.

It may have simply been how I cooked them (how long are you supposed to cook them anyway? And how?) but yeah…overall, super disappointing dinner. Thankfully my girlfriend is a wonderful cook and I ate some food she had made for me a couple of days prior.

Have y’all tried making these dishes? How did it go?

xx Vic



Hello, welcome to my blog! I am a 200 hr- RYT and a recent college graduate! My blog is a space where I share stories of my personal endeavors with some poetry, recipes, and yoga mixed in! For yoga inquiries, please email me at yoga@unziptheselips.com. For general inquiries, please email me at hello@unziptheselips.com. Thank you for visiting!

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