Speaking My Mind

Que Será, Será

Today was really good.

I had a great class this morning, got a lot of studying done, and ate meals with some friends and met one new person. I also ran into my RA and talked to her. It was nice…I feel like I can actually complete the goals I set out for myself to help me get over my ex and get adjusted to college life better.

I’m not saying I didn’t get sad or miss my ex at all…I still think about her. I go through stints of anger, sadness, rejection…among other feelings. I get nostalgic when I start thinking of our memories too. But every time that happens I remind myself of all that I can achieve and that I have ahead for me…and I also keep running into people I haven’t seen in awhile that make me remember other memories and they help distract me from feeling sad.

I’m trying not to never feel sad because that’s not good…I need to mourn a bit and get it all out. But I’m also trying to move on and be positive. When I send her the package of her stuff, I’m going to include a brief letter about maybe reconnecting again one day but otherwise I need to just move on. My ex caused me more stress than necessary…she hurt me too. She played with my emotions and just…in my opinion she didn’t always act like she cared for me.

But like my friend said, maybe she couldn’t care for me because she couldn’t even care for herself. Which is why she left…so she could learn how to care for herself.

She didn’t just leave me though…I also left her. It was mutual.

Oh I got class now…talk to you guys soon! Hope all is well with you xx


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