• feminist blogs,  Speaking My Mind

    Roger Rabbit

    Hello, all

    Things have been crazy lately.  There has been a lot of lectures from my parents as they struggle to understand and accept my “no-label” sexuality, tears, stress and anxiety, tension, and lack of sleep.

    It’s funny how I thought my mom was going to take my sexuality well…she said I threw a bomb onto the house and she has been waking me up in the early mornings, hounding me with questions about my sexuality, giving me lectures about AIDS, expressing her distaste in my lack of religious beliefs and her disappointment in me, how she thinks I’ve been brainwashed…she has offended me many times.

    Conversely, my dad, who also feels disappointed, is not acting that way toward me as much, and I thought he would be the parent that would take this news the hardest.  He works a lot so he’s not around much…but when he is around things are generally okay with him.

    However, I’m scared to be alone with my mom in fear that we’re going to get into an argument like we did yesterday.  With my dad, I don’t think he’s randomly going to bring up my sexuality.

    Anyway, things have been rough in my household lately.  I’ve been fighting a lot and crying…I haven’t been this distressed with my parents since my sophomore year of high school.  It’s kinda weird…I’ve been thinking about how and why we stopped fighting so much…it was because I stopped “rebelling” and started doing what they wanted me to do.  Except the problem now isn’t with what I’m doing, it’s with who I am.  Although they hated that I am dating Janice*.

  • Poetry,  Speaking My Mind

    “This Was A Prison”

    from google images

    No one knows

    My inner heart

    Where my feelings are conflicted

    And restricted…

    They all say “you’re in the closet”

    But I feel more like I’m imprisoned

    Trapped inside myself

    Dark, solitary confinement

    In the dark

    I can still hear

    Homophobic slurs

    The disgusting jeers

    Violence and hate are used to create

    Humiliation and shame

    And loveless preachers preach that hell is a queer person’s fate

    Yet the outed walk hand in hand with their dates

    Pride shines on each face

    I long to be with them

    But for now, I’m safe

    I’m behind bars

    Locked away

    In the dark

    Where it’s quiet

    Where I’m surpressed

    My feelings

    My thoughts

    Passion and lust for love

    Are all safe from hate

    I hate that I have to “come out”

    Why can’t a girl loving another girl be a norm?

    It’s just the way some girls are born…

    But even after many years

    Many people coming out

    And being proud

    It’s still not widely accepted

    In some places, being queer is not even talked about

    At least I now know

    And I can admit it

    I like girls

    I like them a lot

    But journal, you’re the only one that knows

    You’re the only one that I can

    Talk to

    And it sucks that in this jail

    This closet

    I am alone.

    © 2013-2014 Vic Romero

    <<wrote this on 14 December 2013 before I came out to a few people…although I have come out to the most important people in my life (excluding my parents), I still feel like I’m in the closet (especially because my parents don’t know) but at least now I have people (and an amazing girl) to connect to and talk about my sexuality with.  Anyway, below is the quote that inspired me to write this poem.  The quote below that one is a great reflection of how I feel about my sexuality nowadays.  Thank you for reading 🙂 >>

    “They got it wrong when they called it “the closet.” This was a prison. Solitary confinement. I was locked inside, inside myself, dark and afraid and alone. (Chapter. 23)”
    ― Julie Anne Peters, Keeping You a Secret

    “The best thing about coming out is, it’s totally liberating. You feel like you’ve made this incredible discovery about yourself and you want to share it and be open and honest and not spend all your time wondering how is this person going to react, or should I be careful around this person, or what will the neighbors say? And it’s more. It’s about getting past the question of what’s wrong with me, to knowing there’s nothing wrong, that you were born this way. You’re a normal person and a beautiful person and you should be proud of who you are. You deserve to live with dignity and show people your pride.”

    ― Julie Anne Peters, Keeping You a Secret

  • feminist blogs,  Speaking My Mind

    Shortcomings

    I just got back from a Board of Ed meeting. It was terrible. They kept going around in circles with their discussion. It was a waste of an hour.

    Even all principals/administrators in the district were bored. Many were texting or sleeping or zoning out. It was pretty funny.

  • Poetry

    Tattooed

    I can’t stand up straight
    Not when she’s looking at me
    When we’re face to face
    Her caramel eyes
    Are salty and sweet
    Seeing right through me
    But not quite
    She doesn’t know that
    I can’t get her off my mind

    ©VicRomero

    from google images

     

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